If you’re reading this, you probably already know the London swinging and open relationship scene. You’ve been to the clubs, chatted with the usual crowd, and maybe spent time on a few apps too.
But what do you do when it starts to feel a bit dry?
Maybe you’re running into the same people over and over.
Maybe the energy just isn’t there.
Sure, swinger dating apps like GroupFun are always an option. But what else is out there? How can you shake things up and meet new people without heading back to the same clubs?
Here are some of the best ways to meet swingers in London outside of the usual club scene.
Try Swinger Socials and Pub Nights
Not every meet-up has to happen in a dark club. Across London, you’ll find socials that are more casual. These are often held in pubs or private venues and are great for chatting, flirting and getting to know people without the pressure.
You can usually spot these events on forums, Telegram groups or UK swinger sites like GroupFun. They might be billed as “mixer nights” or “meet and greets” and are often open to couples, singles and throuples alike.
The vibe is relaxed. People are there to talk, grab a drink and maybe see if there’s a connection. It’s perfect if you want to ease into things or just fancy a different pace.
Some socials are invite-only or ask for a quick chat with the host before giving the details. Don’t let that put you off. It’s just to keep the event safe and respectful.
Go to Sex-Positive Workshops and Events
London has a growing number of events focused on things like body confidence, kink, ethical non-monogamy and open relationships. They’re not swinger parties, but they attract the kind of crowd you’ll want to meet. And what more can you ask for?
Think talks, workshops or guided discussions about pleasure, consent or relationship styles. You’ll find a good mix of couples, singles and curious newcomers. No pressure to perform, just a chance to connect with open-minded people.
Check listings on sites like Eventbrite or FetLife. You can also follow Instagram accounts linked to sex-positive communities in London. Many of them host events in places like Shoreditch, Soho or Camden.
It’s a great way to meet people who are already tuned into the lifestyle, even if they don’t call themselves swingers.
Join Fitness and Wellness Communities
This one might surprise you. Some of the most open and friendly people in the lifestyle scene can be found in yoga studios, fitness groups and wellness circles. These spaces aren’t set up for swinging, but they often attract people who value confidence, connection and open-mindedness.
Try smaller studios offering partner yoga, breathwork, tantra-style classes or even regular sessions like pilates or strength training. Places in areas like Hackney, Clapham or Notting Hill often have a more social feel.
You’re not there to chat people up during class. But over time, you’ll build connections. Maybe it leads to post-class drinks or an invite to a group event. People talk, and the scene tends to overlap.
Even if it doesn’t lead to anything, you’re still doing something good for yourself.
Explore Digital Spaces Beyond the Big Apps
Most people know about the big swinger apps, but there are smaller, more focused digital spaces that are worth your time. These places feel more personal and less chaotic.
Forums like the one on GroupFun are a good place to start. You can join threads, ask questions and spot local events or socials. It’s less about swiping and more about proper conversation.
Telegram and WhatsApp groups are also popular. Many local hosts run invite-only chats for events or just general talk about the scene. To get in, you often need to message someone through a forum or profile first, then they’ll send you a link.
You’ll also find Facebook groups, although they tend to stay private and use coded language. Look for keywords like “alternative dating London” or “open relationships UK” rather than swinging, which can get flagged.
The best part of these smaller spaces is that people tend to show up. You’ll find more real conversations and fewer time-wasters.
Final Notes
The London swinger scene doesn’t end at the club door. If you’re feeling stuck or just want to meet new people in a different setting, there are plenty of ways to keep things fresh.
Socials, workshops, fitness spaces and online groups all offer chances to connect without the usual pressure. You might need to put yourself out there a bit, but it’s worth it. The more you explore, the more you realise how many open-minded people are already around you.
Charles Lace is a distinguished UK-based writer, born in 1975 in Brighton, who has become a prominent voice in the open relationship and swinger communities. His passion for exploring and documenting alternative lifestyles, particularly in the UK, has made him a well-known figure in these circles.
After studying Creative Writing at the University of East Anglia, Lace began his career as a freelance journalist for London newspapers. In his late 20s, he found his niche writing about non-monogamous relationships and the swinger lifestyle. His breakthrough came in 2005 with the publication of “Open Hearts, Open Doors: An Introduction to Ethical Non-Monogamy,” which became an unexpected bestseller in its niche.
Known for his frank yet sensitive approach, Lace’s writing style combines personal anecdotes with well-researched information and expert interviews. He regularly contributes to various swinger publications, most notably through his column in “Lifestyle Horizons,” a popular UK-based magazine for the swinger and polyamorous communities.